Tuesday, December 17, 2013

The Best Speech Ever

I'm always thankful when Jimmy V week comes. It's that sweet reminder to love life and live it fully. Not everyone had the opportunity I had to experience this day, this very moment. I am lucky. We all are. Jimmy V embodies the enthusiasm I strive to carry with me each day.

On March 4, 1993, Jim Valvano was awarded the inaugural Arthur Ashe Courage and Humanitarian Award at the first annual ESPY Awards. Following is his acceptance speech.

Thank you, thank you very much. Thank you. That’s the lowest I’ve ever seen Dick Vitale since the owner of the Detroit Pistons called him in and told him he should go into broadcasting.

I can’t tell you what an honor it is, to even be mentioned in the same breath with Arthur Ashe. This is something I certainly will treasure forever. But, as it was said on the tape, and I also don’t have one of those things going with the cue cards, so I’m going to speak longer than anybody else has spoken tonight. That’s the way it goes. Time is very precious to me. I don’t know how much I have left, and I have some things that I would like to say. Hopefully, at the end, I will have said something that will be important to other people too.

 But, I can’t help it. Now I’m fighting cancer, everybody knows that. People ask me all the time about how you go through your life and how’s your day, and nothing is changed for me. As Dick said, I’m a very emotional and passionate man. I can’t help it. That’s being the son of Rocco and Angelina Valvano. It comes with the territory. We hug, we kiss, we love. When people say to me how do you get through life or each day, it’s the same thing. To me, there are three things we all should do every day. We should do this every day of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. Number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that’s a full day. That’s a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you’re going to have something special.

 I rode on the plane up today with Mike Krzyzewski, my good friend and wonderful coach. People don’t realize he’s ten times a better person than he is a coach, and we know he’s a great coach. He’s meant a lot to me in these last five or six months with my battle. But when I look at Mike, I think, we competed against each other as players. I coached against him for fifteen years, and I always have to think about what’s important in life to me are these three things. Where you started, where you are and where you’re going to be. Those are the three things that I try to do every day. When I think about getting up and giving a speech, I can’t help it. I have to remember the first speech I ever gave.

I was coaching at Rutgers University, that was my first job, oh that’s wonderful (reaction to applause), and I was the freshman coach. That’s when freshmen played on freshman teams, and I was so fired up about my first job. I see Lou Holtz here. Coach Holtz, who doesn’t like the very first job you had? The very first time you stood in the locker room to give a pep talk. That’s a special place, the locker room, for a coach to give a talk. So my idol as a coach was Vince Lombardi, and I read this book called “Commitment To Excellence” by Vince Lombardi. And in the book, Lombardi talked about the fist time he spoke before his Green Bay Packers team in the locker room, and they were perennial losers. I’m reading this and Lombardi said he was thinking should it be a long talk, or a short talk? But he wanted it to be emotional, so it would be brief. So here’s what I did. Normally you get in the locker room, I don’t know, twenty-five minutes, a half hour before the team takes the field, you do your little x and o’s, and then you give the great Knute Rockne talk. We all do. Speech number eight-four. You pull them right out, you get ready. You get your squad ready. Well, this is the first one I ever gave and I read this thing. Lombardi, what he said was he didn’t go in, he waited. His team wondering, where is he? Where is this great coach? He’s not there. Ten minutes he’s still not there. Three minutes before they could take the field Lombardi comes in, bangs the door open, and I think you all remember what great presence he had, great presence. He walked in and he walked back and forth, like this, just walked, staring at the players. He said, “All eyes on me.” I’m reading this in this book. I’m getting this picture of Lombardi before his first game and he said “Gentlemen, we will be successful this year, if you can focus on three things, and three things only. Your family, your religion and the Green Bay Packers.” They knocked the walls down and the rest was history. I said, that’s beautiful. I’m going to do that. Your family, your religion and Rutgers basketball. That’s it. I had it. Listen, I’m twenty-one years old. The kids I’m coaching are nineteen, and I’m going to be the greatest coach in the world, the next Lombardi. I’m practicing outside of the locker room and the managers tell me you got to go in. Not yet, not yet, family, religion, Rutgers Basketball. All eyes on me. I got it, I got it. Then finally he said, three minutes, I said fine. True story. I go to knock the doors open just like Lombardi. Boom! They don’t open. I almost broke my arm. Now I was down, the players were looking. Help the coach out, help him out. Now I did like Lombardi, I walked back and forth, and I was going like that with my arm getting the feeling back in it. Finally I said, “Gentlemen, all eyes on me.” These kids wanted to play, they’re nineteen. “Let’s go,” I said. “Gentlemen, we’ll be successful this year if you can focus on three things, and three things only. Your family, your religion and the Green Bay Packers,” I told them. I did that. I remember that. I remember where I came from.

It’s so important to know where you are. I know where I am right now. How do you go from where you are to where you want to be? I think you have to have an enthusiasm for life. You have to have a dream, a goal. You have to be willing to work for it.

I talked about my family, my family’s so important. People think I have courage. The courage in my family are my wife Pam, my three daughters, here, Nicole, Jamie, LeeAnn, my mom, who’s right here too. That screen is flashing up there thirty seconds like I care about that screen right now, huh? I got tumors all over my body. I’m worried about some guy in the back going thirty seconds? You got a lot, hey va fa napoli, buddy. You got a lot.

I just got one last thing, I urge all of you, all of you, to enjoy your life, the precious moments you have. To spend each day with some laughter and some thought, to get your emotions going. To be enthusiastic every day and as Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Nothing great could be accomplished without enthusiasm,” to keep your dreams alive in spite of problems, whatever you have. The ability to be able to work hard for your dreams to come true, to become a reality.

Now I look at where I am now and I know what I want to do. What I would like to be able to do is spend whatever time I have left and to give, and maybe, some hope to others. Arthur Ashe Foundation is a wonderful thing, and AIDS, the amount of money pouring in for AIDS is not enough, but is significant. But if I told you it’s ten times the amount that goes in for cancer research. I also told you that five hundred thousand people will die this year of cancer. I also tell you that one in every four will be afflicted with this disease, and yet somehow, we seem to have put it in a little bit of the background. I want to bring it back on the front table. We need your help. I need your help. We need money for research. It may not save my life. It may save my children’s lives. It may save someone you love. And ESPN has been so kind to support me in this endeavor and allow me to announce tonight, that with ESPN’s support, which means what? Their money and their dollars and they’re helping me -we are starting the Jimmy V Foundation for Cancer Research. And its motto is “Don’t give up, don’t ever give up.” That’s what I’m going to try to do every minute that I have left. I will thank God for the day and the moment I have. If you see me, smile and give me a hug. That’s important to me too. But try if you can to support, whether it’s AIDS or the cancer foundation, so that someone else might survive, might prosper and might actually be cured of this dreaded disease. I can’t thank ESPN enough for allowing this to happen. I’m going to work as hard as I can for cancer research and hopefully, maybe, we’ll have some cures and some breakthroughs. I’d like to think, I’m going to fight my brains out to be back here again next year for the Arthur Ashe recipient. I want to give it next year! 

I know, I gotta go, I gotta go, and I got one last thing and I said it before, and I want to say it again. Cancer can take away all my physical abilities. It cannot touch my mind, it cannot touch my heart and it cannot touch my soul. And those three things are going to carry on forever.

I thank you and God bless you all.

Christmas Traditions: The Carolina Inn

The Carolina Inn is always such a delight, especially during the holidays. Their halls are decked out with gingerbread creations, their 12 days of Christmas display and general cheer.


My mom and I enjoyed Christmas brunch at the Inn last year, and this year Hank joined in on the fun too. We checked out the decorations and then indulged in quite the feast.


This year I was introduced to their peppermint cheesecake. Oh my goodness.


We had the best time, and I love this sweet (literally!) tradition during the holidays.

Christmas Traditions: Bestie Style

On Thursday May and I celebrated our ninth year of A Very Bestie Christmas. Last year we slumber partied at her house before our work Christmas party and this year at mine. We played around Raleigh for a bit before heading to an always delicious dinner at Daniel's.


Once home, we traveled from tree to tree opening presents. We always have fun making our display at the end. This year we even created a fiesta of a video.

Christmas Traditions: Cozy Home

There are a few necessities required to make an evening at our home Christmas cozy. First and foremost, I set the mood with music, and not just any holiday music, Kenny G's Miracles. It's my favorite holiday album of all time, and I think it's pretty much perfect.


There is no fireplace in this home, but fear not thanks to Time Warner Cable's channel 1047. Their yule log has warmed us up for years complete with crackling and popping.


The last necessity in this trifecta is candlelight provided by a good holiday scent. Right now we are working with NEST which has just the right amount of pine. 


Cheers to all things Christmas cozy and bright.

Christmas Traditions: Santa for Dogs

For the past two years, Bentley has had his own Christmas party to attend.


Bentley got all dapper in his Christmas sweater, and we were on our way. This evening is hosted by his kennel / vet, and you tour the facility stopping at different stations for snacks, treats and raffles. The finale is a photo with Santa. Bentley let Santa know he would love a collar, toy and a renewed subscription to BarkBox. Naughty or Nice? We shall see.

Christmas Traditions: The Griswolds

Christmas Vacation is a must watch on my holiday movie list. This year my love for this classic soared to new heights as my friend May threw a Griswold Family Christmas Party. My favorite part of her snack table? It was complete with jelly of the month club jellies.


Here we are as Ellen Griswolds striking the bestie pose.


Hank was Eddie, and I was sticky-sap Ellen (I glued magazine pieces to my fingers).


It was a nice night filled with eggnog, moose mugs and lots of costumes.

Friday, December 6, 2013

Christmas Traditions: Apron Up


I've got favorite Christmas cookies like my mom's frosted shortbread cookies. I love the TLC put into a tin of a variety of homemade Christmas cookies, what a treat. My grandma use to mail a tin, and my dad and I would call first dibs on her peanut butter blossoms. I baked a batch for work this week, and yep, they're addiction level hasn't changed one bit.

Christmas Traditions: Craft

Speaking of SW, for the past two years I've participated in their cute as can be ornament swap (2011 | 2012), and I'm excited to be doing the same again this year. It seemed like the perfect thing to do since I've gotten in the habit of crafting a different ornament each year. 


It will always be about Winedeer, but this year I'm loving crafting and painting bottle cap snowmen. Just in: the 2013 SW Ornament Swap Recap. Here's a cute picture someone in my exchange group posted of the ornaments she received. Hey, Mr. Snowman.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Christmas Traditions: Gingerbuild

I love building gingerbread houses, barns, you name it. My mom already has this year's gingerbread house kit ready to go when we are all together for the holidays.


For the past three years, I've competed in the Southern Weddings Gingerbread Barn Building Competition (2011 | 2012). It's pretty much all levels of amazingly fun. It's a bunch of girls at The Carolina Inn working in teams to create the most Southern gingerbread barns possible. The evening is complete with hot chocolate, cookies and even prizes. It's Christmas dreams come true. My team came in first place the inaugural year, and last night, my team took first place again! We screamed and hugged and were as happy as can be. Then we celebrated with local brews and sweet potato fries - a winning combination.

Christmas Traditions: Cocoa Loco


No sooner than Dec. 1 hits is it deemed mini-mallow season in our home. Swiss Miss makes a nice K-Cup. Combine that with a bit of milk and the aforementioned mallows, and it's angel puffs in a mug for us. I made a cup for Hank tonight, but now this post has got me thinking…

Christmas Traditions: BIG Happ

Each year Hank and I receive a sweet surcee* for our tree, a Christopher Radko ornament. 


This ornament represents a big moment we had in the year. This year, Hank's mom gifted our ornament to the theme of London. Yippee! It's fun to place each Radko on the tree while decorating and think back on the BIG happening that was the highlight of a given year.

*surcee: a southern term for a thoughtful gift given unexpectedly or for no reason i.e. the best kind of gift!

Christmas Traditions: Decorate Me

I started making a list of the 25 traditions that make Christmas mean so much to me - what gets me so excited about this one magical month. Some old, some new, here begins my 25.

A decoration here and a decoration there...



{little smokers from Germany}


{love letter ornaments}


{snuggling pillows}

I love the turkey so you won't see one decoration peep out before Thanksgiving Day has come to a close. By Friday the totes are down from the attic, and the decorations are finding their new home around the house. Christmas decorations make our house feel all the more cozy. I'm always on the hunt for a neat new decoration to add to the mix. With Christmas being such a presence in Germany, I had the best time scouring holiday shops to find unique ornaments and such. My favorite find was that cute pair of whimsy smokers above.

Thankful.

Families united and just like that, Thanksgiving happened.




We ate a lot, were thankful for a lot and are always grateful for this sweet holiday.